Thursday, October 29, 2009

strength....

I come from a family of music-lovers... it seems my memories of my Dad always have him whistling or singing a little tune. My mom played the piano so music filled our home. My sisters play the piano and all of us kids sing... so it's no surprise when God drops a song in my path when things are hard... or even joyous.

Today as I was driving home in the rain feeling rather numb this song came on the cd I had playing and I just kept hitting repeat because it ministered to me... and is what's really in my heart of hearts...

You are Faithful
by Hillsong

Lord of all the earth
how you care for me
You have made me
You will saved me
and carry me always

You are faithful
You are faithful
You are faithful
Your joy is my strength

Lord you are my guide
I rely on You
I put my hope in things not seen
Your promises are all true

Always you are with me
Your hand will lead me
My trust is in Your name

You are faithful
You are faithful
You are faithful
Your joy is my strength


Then as I opened my Bible to read from while I ate my lunch He took me to this verse....

Psalm 18:1 & 2:
I love you , Lord;
you are my strength.
The Lord is my rock, my fortress, and my savior...

He is faithful and He IS my strength... that about says it all. Even when things are rough, when puppies die and little kids get cancer... when you feel alone... in the midst of things you don't understand... in the quietness... He is there. He is there and He knows exactly what we need when we need it. Sometimes, it comes in the comfort of a song or the hug of a friend or even... just.... being. He is faithful...

Tuesday, October 20, 2009

a fork in the road....

I sit here with two different options before me. Which path do I take? Lord, I want to be where you want me to be... that's always been my desire. Today's verse:

"I know the Lord is always with me. I will not be shaken, for He is right beside me." (Psalm 16:8)

As I look at the two paths in front of me... one seems easier and faster, a more direct route in some ways. The other path is harder and longer... more challenging... and yet... I feel the Lord calling me to follow Him.

As I look back at my life, I see hardships but there has been growth along the way. I KNOW He has been with me each and every step, through each and every trial and challenge.

Course, my flesh cries out and doesn't want the pain - who in their right mind would?! But that's just it... the flesh always wants to take the easy route.

He is with me and I know He is directing my each and every step. I will trust in HIM alone. I will follow Him where ever He may take me and even if the road we travel seems hard, I will not be shaken because I KNOW He is right here beside me.

Hmm... guess the choice is made! =)

Saturday, October 17, 2009

moments in time...

This week was an interesting to say the very least...

Monday - I found a beautiful new $100 bill in an envelope lying on the ground outside a building at school. Feeling badly for the person who lost it, I took it to the Student Services office so they could hold onto it in case someone would come looking for it. I later found out if it went unclaimed after 30 days, it would be mine. Finding that money and deciding what to do... was a moment in time.

Tuesday - I received a call from Student Services and the owner had indeed come looking for the money. It ended up belonging to a single mom with three kids who works part-time at the campus. She was amazed and I was blessed with the joy of knowing that the lost had been found. Hugging a stranger who was amazed at the goodness of God... was a moment in time.

Wednesday - I had two tests on the same day. For most college students is this a normal occurrence but for me... I was stressed to say the least. Add... on top of two tests my English assignment I had spent HOURS on came back to me with a grade that I thought said "not good enough". I also had a period of feeling like I had failed God in helping someone. Two tests and feeling down... was a moment in time.

Thursday - I went to the library to breathe and spend some time with the Lord when He began speaking to me about the many times in my life where I felt I was walking in more then what I could bear. Situations that were hard and difficult and painful to say the least. He was reminding me of those times and how I felt I couldn't handle much more and yet each and every time He rescued me and delivered me... out of them all! I was asking Him to help me with my test anxiety and He reminded me of how He has called me on this journey and even though it seems hard at the moment, He will bring me through it so He receives the Glory. As I was leaving the library a man stopped me and asked me what I was studying. "Oh... I'm taking my general Math and Science classes because I want to go into Physical Therapy", I replied. He asked me how long that took and I explained that I would spend a year at Metro catching up and then I would do a year at Clarkson where I would graduate with an Associates as an Assistant and then hopefully go on from there. He told me to not waste my time on the Associates but to go for the end goal... to go for what I felt I should be doing. It was a moment in time where I felt the presence of God settle down on me. A moment where I knew this wasn't just a stranger sitting there being nice to me, it was the voice of the Lord speaking to me. I explained how I had always been afraid of Physical Therapy because of how I had done in high school. He went on to tell me how I shouldn't worry about how I did in high school. "That was then, this is now" he said and he explained how we all do silly things in high school. "Don't let how you did then, hold you back from what you're supposed to do now."

Friday - as part of the Clarkson application process I had scheduled to do eight hours of observation of Physical Therapists. I spent the day observing and asking questions. What were the differences between a Physical Therapist and a Physical Therapist Assistant and did the credits transfer from the classes I would take as an Assistant into the Physical Therapy programs offered at area colleges. What were their suggestions?

As I look back at the ups and downs of this week I see the Hand of God. He's shown me how there will be times where I will do really well and be really happy with how things are going. Then, there will be times where I feel like I failed and wonder why in the world God would have me walking this path. He revealed to me that if I will just simply lean on and rely on Him, He WILL take me through this journey. He WILL rescue me in the hard places and He WILL continue to lead me and guide me each step as I trust in Him.

I believe He has a plan and a purpose for all of these struggles we face and have faced. I believe that the loss of a child, another who was diagnosed and healed of a serious illness, a husband with a back injury and a 43 year woman starting to pursue Physical Therapy.... it all fits together for my good and for His Glory!

I went and picked up the book that God used as a catalyst for this journey and I read this line that speaks volumes...

"There is an old aphorism: 'No guts, no glory.' When we don't have the guts to step out in faith and chase lions, then God is robbed of the glory that rightfully belongs to Him." -- Mark Batterson

I don't want to rob Him of the Glory He deserves.

For this moment in time... I will trust in Him and give Him all the praise and Glory for this weeks... "moments in time".